Monday, August 01, 2005


The Enterprise has become a police state. They've "densified" (comes from making dense) our cubes. You say that you don't know what redensified means? Neither did any of us BEFORE the redensification. That's probably because if everyone DID know, there would be a riot. The Enterprise has decided to make our cubes 35% smaller! The cubes are 6x7 which is 42 square feet. Just enough for a chair and a work surface. The shelves hang from the cube panel.

What fun is this? I work in a closet. My walk-in closet at home is larger than my entire work area at the Enterprise.

But it's called Redensification. (I'm unsure if there has been a prior densification, thus the REdensification classification.) I may not be spelling it correctly because it doesn't exist in any dictionary I looked in. But I guess it sounds better then "pack them in like sardines." Oh, and that's another thing.

The cube cops came around and told the folks to get rid of their fish tank. No more natural things to look at while working. They want heads down, full-throttle, production producing drones. They don't want folks sprinkling fish flakes into a fish tank and dreaming of better environments. Oh, and while we are talking about fish and water, no more water cooler. Nope, it's an OSHA hazard. Too many empty water jugs loitering near the windows. We can't have that. Someone is liable to trip over a two and a half foot high water jug on the way to the bathroom. That'll never do.

So we're resigned to work in our steamer trunks, steaming, while the executives eat steaks on the top floors. Oh no, don't worry about us down here in the pits of despair. We'll manage. We'll just keep pumping out the code.

Never mind that all of this goes against the studies about office space in Peopleware by DeMarco.

One of the guys has decided to remove the work surface and replace it with a six foot couch and coffee table. Then he'll prop his feet up and do his work on his notebook in his lap. Kind of a passive aggressive approach.

The beatings will continue until morale improves.