Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Insanity Reigns

I know you must be tired of hearing all my work related stories but I have to tell you this one. Just one more, I promise.

(In the event you haven't been reading any of this, you can click on the label below marked "work" and view the latest craziness at the Enterprise. By the way, "Enterprise" in my definition is, corporate America. I have a desk job and I know how to use it.)

Anyway, I'm talking to my boss at our weekly coffee meeting first thing in the morning. We have an exchange. I tell him what the grunts are doing and he tells me what the "Steering Committees" are up to. Wait a minute, I just realized how many of these Enterprise terms I'm using. I'll provide a glossary below.

So, where was I? Oh yeah, so he says: "I showed one of the Steering Committee members the hardware estimate. It's 1 million 85 thousand dollars. But she says to me: 'No, I believe it'll be 1.8 million and I want you to find out why!'"

What? Am I hearing this right? We give her the cost estimate we've received from the folks that know this stuff and she says she thinks it's another number, about double? And now she tells us to go figure out why she thinks it's double? What is this 20 questions? Am I hearing this right? Is this a joke, a dream, a crazy house? Someone pinch me so I can wake up.

I told my boss: "Well, she came up with the number, let her tell us why."

He just shook his head knowingly.

I'm in an insane asylum and the inmates are running it!

Dave's Brief Glossary

Enterprise: corporate America

grunt: someone low on the corporate latter (not on a Steering Committee see below) that never gets the credit but does all the work

Steering Committee: a group of Enterprise executives that second guess every decision the grunts make

I had amnesia once or twice. -- Steven Wright